In The Media
Press Review for Wendy Behary
and Disarming the Narcissist
Since it’s first publication in 2008, Disarming the Narcissist has become to go-to guide for self-help readers and assigned to clients by therapists seeking to escape the influence and abuse of people with narcissistic personality disorder.
The second edition released in 2013 elevated this already essential tool to the level of self-help classic as it becamse available in over 13 languages, including an audiobook reading. Countless people around the world learned from Wendy’s tips, techniques, and teachings to cope and confront the narcissist in their life.
Based on reader and therapist feedback, this fully-revised third edition of Disarming the Narcissist expands on previous learnings to offer new insight to help break free of the traps and pitfalls narcissists set for those around them.
"Conversational narcissists don't necessarily meet the criteria for a formal diagnosis of narcissistic personality disorder (NPD)," Wendy Behary, LCSW, tells mbg. "They're usually somewhere on the spectrum, though." Read the full article at...
Leaders often have a relatively small set of schemas and a corresponding set of modes through which they shift over a course of time. Paul, our CEO, did have a “Healthy Adult” mode (wise, emotionally accessible, reasonable, rational, thoughtful) in which he operated a...
It’s a painful way to live, because no amount of adoration will ever be enough. After every victory, feelings of envy, anger, and frustration squirm back to the surface. Now, Behary says, Trump is “unraveling.” This, too, is predictable, which is why we need to talk...
With narcissists, it’s always about control—anything that allows them to be in charge and hold the position of supreme power. It’s another way of compensating for what we know underneath is a lot of insecurity. The loneliness of narcissists, which we’ve talked about...
A Therapist Attempts to Explain Donald Trump’s Rocky First Few Days in Office – TheCut.com New York Mag
Trump has spent so much time obsessing over the size of the crowd that witnessed his swearing-in and broadcasting false claims about it. “He has to believe it,” Behary said of his fixation. “He consciously overrides the ‘truth’ because the ‘truth’ would be fraught...
In severe cases, Behary said, her patients can be so narcissistic, so immune to normal incentives and cost-benefit evaluation, that she has to take a different approach. “It’s a strategy where you actually fill the narcissistic supply,” Behary said. Whereas in most...
Radio and TV Interviews and Podcasts
Interviewed by Anna Marcolin, BadAss Confidence Coach / April 2022
How to Deal With a Narcissist
Confronting and Disarming a Narcissist: Wendy BeharyMarch 2022 iTunes: https://susanstiffelman.com/encore-episodes-co-parenting-with-a-narcisssist/Spotify: https://susanstiffelman.com/encore-episodes-co-parenting-with-a-narcisssist/
An Interview with Tara Bixby https://courageouslyu.libsyn.com/85-wendy-behary-disarming-the-narcissist
This is an interview with Tracy Malone https://susanstiffelman.com/encore-episodes-co-parenting-with-a-narcisssist/
If you have ever wondered “what is narcissism?” or “does my partner have narcissism?”, then this podcast is for you. In this episode we cover:What narcissism means. Different kinds of narcissism.How common narcissism is.Where narcissism comes from.The impact of...
specializing in narcissism and high-conflict couples therapy
Wendy Behary is the founder and Director of The Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey and The Schema Therapy Institutes of NJ-NYC and DC. She has been training professionals and supervising psychotherapists for more than 30 years.
Raves & Reviews
For Wendy Behary and Disarming the Narcissist
“If there is a narcissist in your life, I highly recommend this book! This valuable book offers great insight and concrete suggestions for changing your thinking and responses so you can interact with narcissists more effectively, whether you’re a family member, intimate, friend, coworker, or therapist.”
—Judith Beck, PhD, president of the nonprofit Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy, and author of Cognitive Behavior Therapy
John M. Gottman
“Disarming the Narcissist in its new edition continues to be a useful guide for anyone doing therapy with a narcissist, or even for those in a relationship with such a person. The book is an essential guide for this widespread problem.”
—John M. Gottman, PhD, author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work
“In this new edition, Wendy shows you why you feel so lonely and misunderstood in these relationships, and why you keep your own needs tucked away. The insights Wendy Behary provides make this an essential book for anyone in a relationship with a narcissist.”
—Randi Kreger, coauthor of Stop Walking on Eggshells, and author of Stop Walking on Eggshells for Parents
“In its third edition, the deeply insightful Disarming the Narcissist is a classic with good reason: it offers survivors of narcissism helpful guidance and protection while never dehumanizing anyone. In that way, it continues to stand out in the now-crowded field of books addressing narcissism.”
—Craig Malkin, PhD, lecturer at Harvard Medical School, and author of Rethinking Narcissism
“Using the approach of understanding the psychological makeup of the disorder, Behary accomplishes what seems like an impossible task; strategies to help the reader understand and communicate better with a narcissist are here!”
—Karyl McBride, PhD, author of Will I Ever Be Good Enough?, Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, and Will I Ever Be Free of You?
“In this third edition, Wendy also addresses the challenges of co-parenting with a narcissist. She beautifully illustrates the power of empathic confrontation—a tool for enhancing a sturdy core self, and cultivating a reliable and effective advocate for our children amid the inevitable power struggles.”
—Susan Stiffelman, author of Parenting Without Power Struggles, and cohost—with Wendy Behary—of the Co-Parenting with a Narcissist online community
“This latest edition provides up-to-date and practical guidance for not only understanding the problem of narcissism. This book will be a stabilizing and highly recommended resource for anyone who has ever stood in the confusing wake a narcissist leaves.”
—Jill Manning, PhD, licensed marriage and family therapist, researcher, and author of What’s the Big Deal about Pornography?
Disarming the Narcissist
by Wendy T. Behary
Preface by Daniel J. Siegel
Foreword by Jeffrey Young
Published by New Harbinger Publications
AUDIOBOOK (2nd Edition)
Never miss an online seminar or workshop. Gain up-to-date insight to how Schema Therapy and Cognative Therapy techniques can be applied to the modern world around us. Wendy shares her unique insights in podcasts, magazines, and blogs.