call (973) 218-1776
Wendy T. Behary MSW LCSW

specializing in narcissism and high-conflict couples therapy

Wendy Behary

With 30 years post-graduate training and advanced level certifications, Wendy Behary is the founder and director of The Cognitive Therapy Center of New Jersey and The Schema Therapy Institutes of NJ-NYC and DC.

Her private practice is primarily devoted to treating narcissists, partners/people dealing with them, and couples experiencing relationship problems. She is also an expert in coaching individuals in interviewing, public speaking, and interpersonal skills enhancement.

Wendy has been treating clients, training professionals and supervising psychotherapists for more than 20 years. She is also on the faculty of the Cognitive Therapy Center and Schema Therapy Institute of New York, where she has trained and worked with Dr. Jeffrey Young since 1989. Wendy is a founding fellow (and supervisor) of The Academy of Cognitive Therapy (Dr. Aaron T. Beck). She was also the President of the International Society of Schema Therapy (ISST) from 2010-2014.

Wendy Behary has co-authored several chapters and articles on Schema Therapy and Cognitive Therapy. She is the author of “Disarming the Narcissist…Surviving and Thriving with the Self-Absorbed” (New Harbinger Publications). Now translated in 15 languages. Wendy has a specialty in treating narcissists and the people who live with and deal with them. As an author and an expert on the subject of narcissism, she is a contributing chapter author of several chapters on Schema Therapy for narcissism (Wiley and APA Press). She lectures both nationally and internationally to professional and general audiences on the subject of Schema Therapy, and the subject of narcissism, relationships, and dealing with difficult people. Her work with the commercial industry has included speaking engagements focused on interpersonal conflict resolution.

The 3rd edition includes some new and elaborated content:

  • New information on shame, hypersexuality, and infidelity in narcissism
  • Legal information to help you if you are divorcing a narcissist;
  • The impact of narcissism on children

Raves & Reviews

For Wendy Behary and Disarming the Narcissist

Judith Beck

“If there is a narcissist in your life, I highly recommend this book! This valuable book offers great insight and concrete suggestions for changing your thinking and responses so you can interact with narcissists more effectively, whether you’re a family member, intimate, friend, coworker, or therapist.”

—Judith Beck, PhD, president of the nonprofit Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior Therapy, and author of Cognitive Behavior Therapy

John M. Gottman

“Disarming the Narcissist in its new edition continues to be a useful guide for anyone doing therapy with a narcissist, or even for those in a relationship with such a person. The book is an essential guide for this widespread problem.”

—John M. Gottman, PhD, author of The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work

Randi Kreger

“In this new edition, Wendy shows you why you feel so lonely and misunderstood in these relationships, and why you keep your own needs tucked away. The insights Wendy Behary provides make this an essential book for anyone in a relationship with a narcissist.”

—Randi Kreger, coauthor of Stop Walking on Eggshells, and author of Stop Walking on Eggshells for Parents

Craig Malkin

“In its third edition, the deeply insightful Disarming the Narcissist is a classic with good reason: it offers survivors of narcissism helpful guidance and protection while never dehumanizing anyone. In that way, it continues to stand out in the now-crowded field of books addressing narcissism.”

—Craig Malkin, PhD, lecturer at Harvard Medical School, and author of Rethinking Narcissism

Karyl McBride

“Using the approach of understanding the psychological makeup of the disorder, Behary accomplishes what seems like an impossible task; strategies to help the reader understand and communicate better with a narcissist are here!”

—Karyl McBride, PhD, author of Will I Ever Be Good Enough?, Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers, and Will I Ever Be Free of You?

Susan Stiffelman

“In this third edition, Wendy also addresses the challenges of co-parenting with a narcissist. She beautifully illustrates the power of empathic confrontation—a tool for enhancing a sturdy core self, and cultivating a reliable and effective advocate for our children amid the inevitable power struggles.”

—Susan Stiffelman, author of Parenting Without Power Struggles, and cohost—with Wendy Behary—of the Co-Parenting with a Narcissist online community

Jill Manning

“This latest edition provides up-to-date and practical guidance for not only understanding the problem of narcissism. This book will be a stabilizing and highly recommended resource for anyone who has ever stood in the confusing wake a narcissist leaves.”

—Jill Manning, PhD, licensed marriage and family therapist, researcher, and author of What’s the Big Deal about Pornography?